"Which church you are?" asks the flat-faced Nigerian who has decided to sit opposite me. "No church," I say, "I'm an atheist." "But you have a religion?" "No, I don't. I'm an atheist." "You believe in God?" "No." "But you are a Christian?" "No." He cannot take this information in. He simply doesn't hear it. "Indians don't speak English well. They do not understand you. They are an underdeveloped people. They need to be socialised. How much change you give me?" he asks the restaurant owner suddenly, leafing through his wallet. "I keep five rupees back," says the restaurant owner, "I was going to give it to you tomorrow." He looks a little alarmed. "What? You keep five rupees? When were you going to tell me this?" "You were talking, sir. I didn't want to be rude." The restaurant owner gives me a secret sad and sympathetic look. The Nigerian gives me an angry leer. I don't trust this man. He has weird eyes. "Don't give that man anything," the restaurant owner hisses at me as the Nigerian talks for a moment on his phone. When he has finished the conversation, he leans in close to me and says: "Indians do not want to be friends. They are underdeveloped. It's so hard to meet Indian gays." I don't know whether he said gays or guys (Indians are easier to understand). But he wants to know the name of my hotel, so I take the restaurant owner's advice, and leave without giving him a thing.